Saturday, May 3, 2008, 08:58 AM
... back into the swing of things. Just wanted to thank everyone who has been so supportive of me over the last year.
You WILL be seeing more of me... .
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( 3 / 5 )Thursday, September 20, 2007, 12:07 PM
And so two months has passed in the blink of an eye... yes the blink of an eye. I haven't posted here since July; thank goodness I was going to post here regularly right?
Please don't ask what the hell is going on in my life... cause I don't even know. Since May 11th I've been on a downward spiral and no matter what I do, no matter what I try, I can't pull up to get any sense of normal back.
My mom dying has had a HUGE impact on me, yet it is the one thing in my life that I am not dealing with. My time has been monopolized by my divorce, court, and my kids. Having to deal with things on my own is one thing... having to deal with things on my own, with three kids depending on just me is another.
Then add to that my job, online obligations, and personal time... it’s like what the hell is going on. I have time for work, sure. I have time for my online obligations. I have for personal socializing. The problem is in my head. I know what needs to be done; I just can't seem to do a damn thing.
I don't even talk to anyone anymore. Shuni, Truce, Trinity, Tommy... all best friends for YEARS not just online but period and I don't even talk to them. Epsilon would have done crashed and burned had it not been for Tommy, Endevour wouldn't be anything without Trinity, my obligations have fallen to the wayside and again; I know what needs to be done, but I can't seem to nor do I have any ambition to.
One day at a time is how I'm taking everything, but taking everything a day at time leaves you no way to plan for anything.
Oh well... we'll see what tomorrow brings.
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( 2.9 / 28 )Wednesday, July 25, 2007, 10:37 AM
How does someone write about the absolute worse time in their life? Just write it all out for the world to see? Don't write about it and try to resume some "normal" blogging? I have no idea.
I'll write in general terms for now. Heck, I almost feel like I need to introduce myself. The person I was on May 10th of this year is not the person I am now.
I have changed. For the better or for the worst? I guess only time will truly answer that.
I have returned to my friends here online and have sorta stepped back into life within the FSF and here at work, though nothing seems normal, nothing seems right, I am uncomfortable in my existance...
All I can do is hope that life feels like life again some day. All I can hope is that I feel comfortable where I am, in my life and inside of me.
I did run away last weekend, heh. After I left work on saturday I drove six hours down to Hilton Head Island, S.C. It was awesome. It's so beautiful down there. I watched the sunrise on the beach... I can't even express how beautiful it was.
I also have a new nephew. My sister had her baby on June 27th... he is so cute.
I have pictures from the beach and of my nephew. My website is a wreck and none of the pages are working. I will get all of that fixed this week some time.
I will do my best to start posting here again regularly. One step at a time.
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( 2.8 / 30 )Wednesday, June 6, 2007, 12:11 PM
Anyone who has been to my moms desk at work, you have had to see these quotes she has typed or hand written posted or taped up on her computer montitor, her desk, or her shelves. I would like to share these quotes with all of you. Take what you want from them, these are the things she looked at every day at work.
Kites rise highest against the wind -- not with it
- Sir Winston Churchill
A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle.
- Erin Majors
Happiness is not a state to arrive at, but a manner of traveling.
Forget mistakes. Forget failures. Forget everything except what you're going to do now and do it. Today is your lucky day.
- Will Durant
Metaphors
B with U
The best way to predict your future is to create it.
- unknown
The person who says it cannot be done should not interupt the person doing it.
- Chinese proverb
You miss 100% of the shots you never take.
- Wayne Gretzky
Never fear shadows... they mean there is a light shining some place near by.
- Ruth E. Renkel
Thoughts determine what you want... actions determine what you get.
Listen to the MUSTN'TS, child
Listen to the DON'TS
Listen to the SHOULDN'TS
The IMPOSSIBLE, the WON'TS
Listen to the NEVER HAVES
Then listen close to me--
Anything can happen, child,
ANYTHING can be.
- Shel Silverstein
"... We can and we've got to do better than this."
- Theodore Giesell (Dr. Seuss)
~ a note on a little box on her desk ~
What you get out of it is what you put into it.
Courage is resisteance to fear.
- Mark Twain
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( 3.1 / 33 )Wednesday, May 23, 2007, 01:15 PM
I heard this song for the first time on the day of my moms funeral. I got the song and played it at her funeral because I liked it so much.
Listen to this song... and think about your mother. This is for you mom. I will miss you forever!
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